It´s never easy to leave...

...literally.
But we left Salento, trudged up that muddy, slurpy trail and caught a collectivo to Armenia in order to move south in Colombia. We headed to Popayan. Supposedly 3 hours to Cali from Armenia, then supposedly 5/6 hours from Cali to Popayan. We always know to add a couple of hours to the end of that but we didn´t know what we had coming.
Getting to Armenia was a sinch. We were out of Salento by 10:30 and made it to Cali in time for a bus around 4:30pm. Originally we were going to stay in Cali. We heard the night life was supposed to be wild, with tons of Salsa and stilettos. We opted for the mud and coffee of Salento so we only saw Cali to and from the bus terminal. In through the north, out through the south, making sure to pass every mechanic and hardware store on the way. For all we know, that´s all the city is, thus making our decision to not stay much easier.
One frustrating thing about buses here is that there´s a terminal, and one would think that´s where people go to wait for and embark on the buses. No. That´s only a select few. Everyone else waits just outside the terminal, perhaps just across the street. Why? We wait and wait and wait to leave the terminal, then when we finally do we stop done the road and pick up a whole slew of other passengers. This makes little to no sense, and is aggravating when you think you´ve finally managed to leave. This happens EVERYWHERE! I´m starting to think we should just wait with them all. But then we´re part of the problem right?
So we finally get out of Cali. The congested city took over an hour to get out of, but it was smooth sailing after that. NOT! After only 2 hours of driving, things start to slow down, significantly, and we realize that there are tons of tractor trailers all along side the road, parked. The bus inches up and up, and then pulls over, as well. It´s dark, it´s almost 7pm. We just want to get there. Please. What is up? We only have a couple more hours to go. We see people getting out of their cars - this is never a good sign. Of course, this isn´t the NYC Subway where a garbled voice gets on and tells you there´s a rat in the tracks and we´ll be moving shortly. No one says anything. Everyone on the bus looks calm but annoyed. The bus inches up past a few more trucks, then pulls over again. Light traffic is coming towards us, but nothing is moving in our direction. This is a dark, mountain road, no lights except for those of the vehicles. A half hour goes by as we continue to creep up the road, stopping and starting every few hundred feet and getting feedback from people that walk up to check out the  situation. We hear the word "derrumbe" and think there must be an accident of some sort. Great!!!
No one seems to know at this point how long it will take, but we are just gratelful that we´re not far from Popayan, while others of the bus are continuing another 10+ hours to the border with Ecuador. The bus pulls up in front of an overcrowded restaurant and we´re told to go get something to eat while we wait for more information. This place has never had so many customers at once. They are running around like elves before Christmas, but way less organized and without enough toys. We decide we might as well sit and have some soup with a man and his adorable daughter until we know more. At this point we´ve been stopped for over an hour, maybe more. The bus ayudante is at the restaurant, too, so we ask him how many hours he thinks we´ll be here for. He says 3 - 5 hours. Our jaws thud on the table and we can´t help but laugh. Excuse me? He shrugs, smiles and says again "Derrumbe". What the hell is this? He goes back to his table and keeps eating. We then decide a proper meal may be in order if we are spending the greater part of this night on this road. Awesome.
After all the food runs out at the restaurant, and the passengers feel they´ve killed enough time there, everyone heads back to the bus to get some sleep. We stretch our legs a bit outside the bus and talk more with the ayudante. Again "derrumbe" comes up. Okay, we need to know what this is. "Y que es derrumbe?" we ask. With a mixture of hand gestures and the use of the word "tierra" we realize it means landslide. Lightbulbs go off and a sudden sense of clarity takes over. Well, a landslide would definitely cause hours of delay on a tiny mountain road. It would also explain the blatant abandonment of 18-wheelers. We are going to be here all night. What would have been just another couple of hours has now turned into an all evening activity. We get on the bus, plug in a podcast and hope that when we wake up we´re in Popayan.
That we were...at 12:30 am. We were groggily awakened by the ayudante, "Popayan, Popayan". Oh yea, right, we don´t want to stay on this bus for the rest of our lives. Forgot about that. We jump up, gather our things and get our backpacks on. We get in a taxi that takes us to a hostel that doesn´t have any free beds. Great. Perfect. Why on earth would we want a bed right now. We walk around the corner to another hostel that does have room, and we walk up the tiny, spiral staircase and fall into sleep.
We are just happy to not be on that mountain anymore. We wake up and do a few laps of Popayan. A beautiful colonial town, with white washed buildings and a beautiful main plaza. We had a delicious breakfast at a small place close by where a family of women cooked and cleaned together in a very calm, familiar atmosphere. We were able to try pasamor de maiz (spoonfed to me by an older woman waiting for her grandson to join her for lunch), a chilled/room temperature, milky, cereal-like soup with corn and added chunks panela (sugar cane). Soooooo good. Made us happy after a night of bus torture. We strolled around some more, bought cute earrings with feathers while enjoying our last serving of raspao on the plaza, and walked up to the mirador to look over the city. We attempted to mail postcards but we didn´t want to pay $2 per card, so opted out until the next stop, hoping Ecuador would be cheaper. We heard there was a soccer game on, so per the recommendation of the hostel walked to a pizza place on the other side of town. Apparently no one else cared about the game, so instead we got sucked into a dramatic tela novela of betrayal and love. Favorite line - "Dejame sola!" (Leave me alone!) Very entertaining.

We went back to the hostel and gathered our things. We were orginally going to spend another night in Popayan, but we just wanted to keep moving to Ecuador. Popayan was preciosa, but wasn´t enough to keep us around for longer. We went to the bus station that night to get an overnight bus to Ipiales, just before the border. 8 hours, and it was. But rather than a coach bus it was a minibus, freezing cold and very uncomfortable. The only seats left weren´t together and it was sketchy! I was in the very first seat with a clear view of the front window, front row to death defying turns tempting fate and my stomach. Once people started getting off at various places we managed to sit together, and proceeded to move another 3 times to seats that were either warmer, or reclined, or didn´t have anyone next to them. Finally we arrived to Ipiales, shaking a bit after two bus rides from hell. It´s never easy, but fresh air and solid ground felt nice.
"Taxi, taxi, taxi!!!" Wait. Let me get my backpack on and my jacket zipped first, please. I know you´ll be there in 5 minutes anyway, still repeating you´re Pokemon name in my face whether I need a taxi or not. Be with you in a moment.
We need to constantly remind ourselves in these instances - Sigh, breathe, you´re alive and well. One step at a time. At least we´re here and not stuck on the road for hours. Breathe. In the near distant future you can sit, maybe eat, even possibly shower. All is good. Life is good. Nothing is that bad. Breathe. Smile.
Sophisticated Koala